Daily workout

Today started out with a 4:30 am swim. I love swimming when the world is quiet. Then off to Strike, a kick butt boxing class that I love. I am grateful right now for my friends who are helping me stay fit. It is always motivating to have someone join you in workouts. Thanks Cat.

Tracy Anderson

Well, I think that Tracy Anderson has no taste buds, and she must think that everything needs to be made into mush. I have not been able to eat her diet as I think it is totally DISGUSTING!!!! I have modified many of her foods and instead of steaming and mashing all the food I am eating it fresh. I also add a few calories as most days she only has you eat around 900-1000 cals a day and that is not for me. I do not love her cardio....bla bla bla. I am beginning to wonder if this workout is for my ANA (anorexic) friends. They are low energy and not upbeat at all. I am doing my cardio of choose in place of hers. I do enjoy the hip exercises and think they are great, I have to have my own music, because the DVD has bla bla bla elevator music. If Tracy was really a dancer all she mastered was how to check her self out in the mirror. I like to have a little more fun, and not take myself this serious.  I guess what I realize is that I can make changes that make me happy and still see results. They may not be ANA, oh I mean Tracy results, but I have lost 4 lbs and I am feeling more fit every day. I will continue to use her toning CD's.

Tomorrow, I know... I'm staring a diet. Well actually yes.

I revived the Tracy anderson metamorphous in the mail and tomorrow will be the first day I have taken my before pictures and that is the inspiration that I need. I will follow the diet and exercise program with some additional exercise put in because I just can't stand not to ride my bike in the summer. I will also add some additional days of weights and I will not eat less than 1200 calories as I think this is unhealthy. Today will be prep day for the week.

one year ago....

So last year i was in the shape of my life, I had just finished ironman and was working out and eating right. Something went horribly wrong in the last 6 months and i fell off the wagon. I am now I think in the worst shape I have ever been in. I am not doing any races this year and i think that it is time for a solid goal. If i can train and finish Ironman, I can get my body to were I want. I know that this will take time, 16 weeks of training for Ironman, so I will be giving myself the same amount of time.

To start out I ordered 30 day boot camp to kick myself into gear and start motivating me with some quick results. I will log in my daily food. I will then start 90 days metamorphose. I will work out everyday and i will plan, pack and prepay my food.

I cant go on down this path, it is too depressing for me. I just spent 3 days in meeting eating like a pig and feeling like one too. I have heart issues and being fat is so bad for me. This is not how I want to live. I am currently addicted to food. This has to stop.

I did it....

I made it through the day with out eating junk. I am so proud of myself. I even went to the donut shop with my family, watched the football game and did this all enjoying the people around me, with out enjoying the food.

I kept water with me the entire time and took an apple to the donut shop. This worked out and I was able to stay strong. Yea Me!

So far so good....can I make it

I know that Jason is going to wake up in a few hours and we are going to take the boys to go and get donuts at Banburry Cross, were they have the most amazing donuts. They taste like a little piece of warm sweet goodness. Everything about them is perfect. So, what is a girl to do who was in tears last night about how she is spinning out of control on the weight war. I have decided that I will go and be with my family, food is such a big part of our lives, and I will enjoy listening to the conversations of my children, talk with my husband, find the joy in being with the people instead of the joy of eating with the people that I love.
I eat a good breakfast and I will keep my water with me at all time today. I have to get off the sugar high and it is today that it begins. Today I will find a new joy of being around food, the joy of the people. Wish me luck.

Why did I do this to myself?

So I just came home from a weekend of fine food and friends. I hop on the scale to see were it lies and i am suddenly stricken  with sadness and a pit of yuck in my stomach. It is not that this one weekend of pie eating fun made me feel this way, it is the long months that have passed by with me thinking that ever day I am going to start tomorrow. So what do i do I shovel in all of the food that I can to make myself feel better. Better, no it does not make me feel better. Tonight I feel the worst about myself that I have in a very long time. i feel like I cant even control my weight, am I that out of control in my life? I know that things have been a little hectic, and I have been skipping out on workouts, lets be honest I have been skipping out on weeks of workouts. with Work, school and wanting to stay in bed because it is cold I have really struggled. Not to mention that I can't seem to stay on top of anything these days.

So now that I have shared the problem, that i am at the heaviest that I have ever been and that I am now out of a healthy BMI for my size I need to find the solution.

1) I will work out for one hour everyday. I will make this a priority
2) I will ask myself "if I can eat that" before I put anything in my mouth. I will treat myself like I am a little kid and the parent at the same time. I know what I should and should not eat.
3) I will stop beating myself up for "messing up" I will continue to strive each moment to do better and stop waiting for tomorrow. That never comes.
4) I will document what I eat
5) I will always eat something good after I eat a not so great item.
6) I will remember that my health is important for my kids and me.